Friday, March 31, 2006

*smiles*

todays afternoon was spent with irsyarudin by my side. (: andkan people! no rules states EX cant spent tyme togeder perr! kan kan kan! grinx! but before anything, let me talk about school first aites. hmm. i was layte for lesson but styll managed to enter the class. was messaging hym when teacher was teaching and soon i fell asleep in clasz as i was too sleepy! hehehe!

after school, 969-ed to tampines to meet hym ; as usual, i was layte. [sowie you!] we proceeded to tampines sportshall as that was the place i had to so called hang around while waiting for hym to finish his friday prayers. so yeahh ; i wayted tyll about two when he FINALLY came out. haha!

we then walked to tampines polycinic as i needed the injection. copmpleted the whole thing at about three plus and trained to buona vista and off we went to macdonalds. gave manager nicholas all the required stuffs and went home finally.

but my afternoon with hym didnt end there! i got home to change and headed for clementi next. to eat KFC! yay!!~ finally ehk youu! haha!~ i got myself the bandito meal while he ate the fish ole meal and two piece chicken. [mentang2 nen kater you lost weight, makan tak agak2.] bluwekx! bibiq saw us there. qwang qwang qwang.

he then became MY part-tyme salesman! i wanted to buy a black shoe and he did the searching of shoes between the stocks available. aint he sweet!? hehehe! went home at around eight. *loveeee!~* kays larhh people. i shant blog any longer. nanti korang jealous plakk. (:

showt out.
TO SOMEONE: hey b***h! cant you just accept the fact that you already lost my bro to someone else? shit xia you! lost my bro then styll got hearts to go for my ex boyfriend next?!~ yes! i know im noone to stop you but over my dead body first if you want hym you biatch! simple saed, you can just simply forget your dream aites! he'll never be yours ; i repeat, NEVER! so dream on!!

L.O.V.E!~

when talking about the word 'L.O.V.E' ; people will tend to think that its an easy words to say. but actually heyy! love is NOT a normal word for you to just say it to anyone at anytime of the dayy ; cos you DONT go around saying "i love you" suka-suka'ly' but you say those words only when you really mean it. and it is supposed to be said to someone whom you really love.

although theres a saying 'love shall not be said for it shall be felt.' but... seriously talking, my conversation with irsyarudin which lasted for an hour or so just now really left me wondering ; wondering and questioning myself about what is really written in his heart. for i've heard all the wierd wierd words coming out from his mouth.

wierd sentences like :-
. "you're my chilli sauce to go with my french fries",
. "you're my sugar for my tea",
. "i'm suddenly feeling so protective of you",
. "when other guys dont get a chance to date you, then TOO BAD for them",
. "you're the women of my dream".

// cmon baby! just what is hidden behind those words? i really need to know. as i dont want any complications to occur only in the later times of the year ; for you know my type of person.

and also, you know of my feelings dont you. so, just say it out to me! i wanna know just the truth! yes ; i do agree that you are a fickle minded person. but please! dont leave me suffering wondering about all this.

** you leave me hanging**

++ the text i sent to hym yesterday ++
well... there you are in simei slieping and here i am in dover crying ; crying and thinking about all those words you said to me during our last conversation. and not to forget, the songs you alunkan before you fell asleep. those words did touch my heart in one way or another but how do i know if every word you say is true or its just an illusion that i have in this porcelain heart of mine. styll. all i can say is "cmon baby! just say out how you exactly feel ; even if it may hurt me deep down, at least i know the truest truth. so, please dont leave me hanging and wondering! yes! i do agree that you are a fickle minded person but believe me when i say that this relationship can go a far distance and that i made possible if we care to give it a second try and have faith and confidence in it! well. im just doing my part letting you know aper sebenarnya yang tersirat dalam my hati kaca ini.

# adoii! pasrah siotx! hahaha!

game instructions:
-the tag victims have to come up with 7 different points of their perfect lover
-specify gender of their target
-tag 7 victims to join the game and leave a comment on their page saying they're been tagged
-if tagged the second time,there's no need to post again. have fun!

gender of my target;
* male

7 pts of my perfect LOVER ::
. One who was born on February 14.
. One who has the IC Number S_ _ _5149A.
. One who loves me ; and only me.
. One who loves Starbuck's rhumba frappucino.
. One who makes the effort to let me know how much he loves and misses me.
. One whom my family approves of me being with.
. One who loves me for being me.

ohwee! <3

okay okay! i apologise for leaving this blog unattended! not in the mood to blog arhh. emotional breakdown plus mood swings. qwang qwang qwang. kkays. i'll blog about friday kayss.
240306
went to skewl as normal ; just that i was extra early. (: i studied without my book and was smsing din at the same tyme till mdm choo had to say "farlyanna! the next tyme i see your phone, its gonna go in my pocket." hehehe! see how rebelious i am. wahahaha! mr pang's lesson was cancelled due to some reasons so lesson ended extra early ; at 1030. and i was sooo thinking of where to go cos im meeting din only at 12 at tampines summore. hmm.
as a result, i took the train from yishun and headed to jurong east and next to tampines. i thought i was early but i was wrong ; for din reached before i did. *angelic smile* [sorie ehkk youu. i didnt do it on purpose sheyy. tak sengaje tapi disengajekan. hehehe.]
we then headed to tampines sports hall as i needed to wayte for hym to do his friday prayers at the nearest mosque. so yess. i wayted till i got so bored and decided to go to the nearest 7-eleven when a few army guys came disterbing. *biaser jugakk. lelaki ; wat to do expect kann.*
bought the newpaper to read and heded back to the sports hall and he came out soon after.
we headed for the library next to talk about his project ; but not for long cos it was sooooo freaking boring! so we decided to walk around tampines ; we walked and walked and walked tyll i got tired and we made the decision to fill our stomach at long john. we ate then walekd to simei mrt [dah makan kene exercise mahh.]
kayss larhh people! my mood to blog has dissapeared arhh. so, i end it here! to be continued...
shout outs
to the few guys who has confessed their love to me ; im very sorry! i just aint prepared to open my heart to any of you guys. its not a sign that i dont love you but im just not ready to commit myself into another relationship.
*IM STYLL HOLDING OUT FOR YOU!*

::only love::
2 a.m. and the rain is falling
Here we are at the crossroads once again
You're telling me you're so confused
You can't make up your mind
Is this meant to be
You're asking me
But only love can say - try again or walk away
But I believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So I'll just play my part
And pray you'll have a change of heart
But I can't make you see it through
That's something only love can do
In your arms as the dawn is breaking
Face to face and a thousand miles apart
I've tried my best to make you see
There's hope beyond the pain
If we give enough, if we learn to trust
[Chorus]
I know if I could find the words
To touch you deep inside
You'd give our dream just one more chance
Don't let this be our good-bye
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
::kenangan cinta::
Kenangan saat berputiknya cinta bersama
Ingat semua... padaku berdua
Mengapa... kesudahan begini yang kau pinta
Mengakhirkan cinta kita
Siapa... Sebenarnya...Yang menjadi punca perpisahan kita
Cinta dan perasaanku hancur kini
Kau pergi... (kau pergi)
( korus )
Andainya engkau tahu
Perasaan ini
Ku kan pasti kau mengerti
Menangis sendiri
Pintaku hanya satu
Sebelum berlalu
Jika engkau disakiti
Pulanglah...
Kan ku nanti kau kembali oh sayang
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
:: one last ::
I never could imagine, life without you
From the moment you walked into my world
Never knew how long a loving flame could burn
But losing you has forced me to learn
That we can't change the way we feel inside
And every try at love never turns out right
We both know it's better if we just let it go
So let's have
Chorus:
One last kiss
One last touch
One last tender moment between us
One last dance
To our first song
While pretending there's nothing wrong
Let's stay here for awhile and
Cherish every moment we're in denial
We both know
Its better if we just let it go
Everytime I try to take a stand at all
I see your face again and I fall
In the middle of the night there's the scent of a rose
The smell of your perfume I suppose
But we can't change the way we feel inside
And every try at love never turns out right
We both know it's better if we just let it go
Baby if we met each other under a different sky
Maybe then things would be much better between you and I
We could always hold on to this one special thing we share
But it would be too much for us to bear
We both know
It's better if we just let it go
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[THIRTY-8 SONGS STUCKED IN MY HEAD]
Akulah Kekasihmu - AXL,
Andai Dapat Ku Undur Masa - AXL,
Bila Cinta Di Dusta - Screen,
Bila Kau Tak Disampingku - Sheila on 7,
Brown Eyes - Destiny's Child,
Dekat Padamu - Yusry,
Di Mana Janjimu Dulu - Spin,
Going Crazy - Natalie,
Haruskah Kita Berpisah - Arrow,
I Dont Wanna Miss A Thing - Aerosmith,
Im All Out of Love - Air Supply,
Kasihku Tetap Abadi - Data,
Kau Dipaksa Aku Terpaksa - Ukays,
Kau Pergi Jua - Adam Ahmad,
Kenangan Cinta - 4U2C,
Kenapa feat. Shazzy - V.E,
Kita Ditakdirkan Berpisah - Screen,
Laguku Untukmu - Hasnol,
Langkah Seiringan - Exists,
Life Goes On - Leanne Rimes,
Mengusung Rindu - Spin,
Meraung - New Boyz,
Nadya - Khairil Yusoff ,
Niat Di Hati Tak Nak Berpisah - Arrow,
One Last - Taufik,
Only love - Trademark,
Pesanan Buat Kekasih - Spring,
Purest Of Pain - Son By Four,
Rindu Serindu Rindunya - Spoon,
Riwayat Cinta 4:38 Misha Omar,
Sejarah Mungkin Berulang - New Boyz,
Semua Tentang Kita - Peter Pan,
Still Holding Out For You - SheDaisy,
Unbreak My Heart - Toni Braxton,
UntukMu Sayang - Febians,
Usah Diturut Kata Hati - Data,
Usah Tinggal Daku Kekasih - Exist &
Vida - Phyne Ballerz.


and ouchh! this is so hurtful xia ; i visited his friendster account and is so freaking shocked and hurt! i mean i dont mind hym deleting my pictures from his account but he didnt even leave ONE as memory. oh my God! and ALL the testimonials i wrote was a waste of time ; it was ALL DELTED. even the ones i wrote when we were FRIENDS.

this really proves that GUYS, being GUYS does not know the meaning behind the saying 'memories are the best souvenir' and 'guys NEVER know how to appreciate a girls PRESENCE in their life.' dammit irsyarudin! urghh!

->Luke: heyy!~ im really very sorry. i didnt mean to hurt you and your feelings. just that i recently ended my relationship and dont think is ready for another one. im saying sorry from the bottom of my heart.

dammit! my eyes really hurt due to the crying xia. yah yah yah... its over. but still, i believe in fate and destiny. and also, in making it a lesson in life. im here to thank my loved ones for being my pillar of strength and keeping me smiling even when im hurting on the inside. NAMELY ;
[one] bibiq sue,
[two] my mama,
[three] my nen,
[four] syz azlindah,
[five] bestie steph,
[six] dude afy,
[seven] syz syakirah,
[eight] syz syahirah,
[nine] syz syafiqah,
[ten] syz athira &
[eleven] syz ana.
thanx many many yarhh loved ones for being there for me. keeping me standing on my feets and smiling despite the fact im going through shitx. i know i suck when im suffering from all this. with my swallon eyes! my mood swings. urgh!

Everything - Lifehouse
Find Me Here
Speak To Me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That's leading me
To the place where I find peace again.
You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light to my soul.
You are my purpose...you're everything.
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
You calm the storms, and you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall.
You steal my heart, and you take my breath away.
Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
Cause you're all I want, You're all I need
You're everything,everything
You're all I want your all I need
You're everything, everything.
You're all I want you're all I need.
You're everything, everything
You're all I want you're all I need, you're everything, everything.
And How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

burp! whoww! i really ate alot for today xia. for i had delifrance for breakfast and macdonalds for dinner! woohhooo. imma happy lady mann! haha. kkays. i shall not mepek and start proper writing. actuallie, WE were talking about kids name and we came up with a few such as ;
BOYS
Danish - Wisdom
Ilham - Intuition/Inspiration
Imran - Prophet's Name
Iqmal - Wealth
Irfan - Full Of Knowledge
Fahyz - Victorious/Winner
Fareez - Knight
Fa'iq - Excellent/Surpassing
GIRLS
Daniesha - Wisdom
Dalila - Gentle/Delicate
Dana - Wise/Intelligent
Fasiha - Literaly/Elequent
Fahyzza - Victorious/Winner
Fiona - Fair
Nur - Light
Sabrina - Legendary Princess.
Siti - Lady
well. honey baby came up with Siti Fateha Daniesha for a girl and Muhammad Ilham Danish Fareez for a boy. but dont you guys think its too long? itu belom termasok his name yet. hmm. while i came up wit Daniesha Faryzza for a girl and Danish Fareez for a boy. but...
dotno larhh ehkk. we'll see about it. hahaha! okays people! feel free to tag my board and comment. (: ciaosz!
-> honey baby: heyy honeyy babyy! as you can see. time really flies yarhh. its been one month. and we've been through alot. the fights ; which hardly stops. the critics we've received ; which often affects our relationship. but hey, we managed to pull through though. and im very sure theres more to come. kan sayang kan. well. hang in there and do stay strong aites ; for i am going to till the end of time. and i promise you i'll stay by your side ; no matter what the future may bring. im really blessed to have someone like you as part of my life. andkann. thanks for being there for me all this while when i really need someone. hmm. we've met with our frequent ups and downs ; but no matter how tiring it may get, i swear i'll climb every single step with you. and heyy! happy one month anniversary once again. i just want you to know ; that for the past one month, i've been the happiest girl alive. (: love you strong AND miss you deep!

im tired to the max but im still gonna update my blog larhh kayss. kesian pulak tengok korang2 nie bacer entry yang samer jekk. hehehe. so, let me ferst begin on writting about yesterday larh kayss.

"yesterday... all my troubles seem so far away." ehkk salah. yesterday was a wonderous day indeed. i came to skewl extra early but slept thruout the lesson. cos i felt time was passing freaking slowly and i was in an air-conditionered room!~ hehex. slept till it was lunch tyme and afy asked me to accompany hym to the coffeeshop to have prata. i didnt eat any tho cos i was worried sick about my baby.

so yeahh! afy had his prata. and we walked back to school for our afternoon lesson. dammit! i slept thruout the lesson again. same reason applies. hehehe. was sleeping when suddenly my baby called at 1.30PM saying that he was oreadi in yishun. i panicked for awhile cos i didnt expect hym to be that early for we were supposed to be meeting only at 3PM. he told me to just concentrate on my lesson. i saed okay den and apologised to hym for making hym wayte. *step concentrate jekk. padahal tido*

finally it was tyme to go home! met hym at the bus stop and trained down to bukit batok as he wanted to buy a new fone for hymself and me too. (: and he did! he got hymself an LG phone and got me a samsung phone. *thanx honey baby* we took a 106 bus home and his ferst messaged to me was "sayang... happy advanced one month anniversary... and i'll love you always...*muackz*"

aww! aint he sweet?! what can i say ; my mister romantic mahh. hehehe. kays larh people! i wanna go lie down on the bed and wayte for his call. ohwee!! nytes.

kak ain: happy belated birthday syz! its not that i didnt remeber your bday. just that on the actual day, my msn nick was "happy birthday kak ain from udin&yana" ; but i am sure you didnt get to view it cos bayang-bayang you online pon i didnt see. well. so here i am again. and im not trying to be rude but can you please not make things between me and hym any worst? we've been together for only one month but yet alot of things has happened. from unblessed relationship and etc. so im begging you please dont make this situation any worse. i just cant take it anymore!
heres the link to view our new phone!
http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b67/hym23her22/phonie.jpg

A REQUEST from eL


1. My world~finally paradise found
2. My Strawberry Short Cake
3. My Search For You Has Just Started...Where Are You?
4. Collection of Thoughts
5. Uniquely HaK
6. And Above All, I HATE YOU.
7. Follow the Stars Home
8. Shake It. Groove It. Move It.
9. - my DIRTY 'lil secret -
10.- werld of OUR own.


Then you select 5 people to pass the love on to:
1. Kakak Ain.
2. Syz Nirah.
3. Nadirah.
4. Diana.
5. Syz Eqa.


And here it goes :
What were you doing 10yrs ago??
ten years ago ehkk? i was eight then. lets recall... being a primary two kid, i guess i was still small and kiute. haha! short and leading a oh-so easy without stress life. how i wish i could turn back time.


5 Songs which you know all the lyrics off your head right now
1. Dia by Fauziah Latiff (ader kene mengener ngan my life mahh)
2. Air Supply - Im All Out Of Love.
3. Too Phat - Just A Friend.
4. Son By Four - Purest Of Pain.
5. Plus One - Here In My Heart.


5 things u would do if u are a millionaire
1. Shop till i drop.
2. Donate to Charity.
3. shop AGAIN.
4. perform the Haj'.
5. save for my future. (:


5 Bad Habits
1. can be VERY late.
2. i do last minutte EVERYTHING.
3. hog on the phone for long hours.
4. biting of nails? =x
5. throwing things all over the place.


5 things you like doing
1. spent time with my loved ones.
2. shopp till i drop.
3. hog on the phone.
4. sleep
.5. be in his arms. <3


5 Things you would never wear, buy, or get new again
1. i'll NEVER WEAR a stud at the right upper part of my ear.
2. i'll NEVER BUY so-called branded stuffs from Bugis.
3. i'll NEVER BUY turtle neck clothings.
4. i'll NEVER WEAR turtle neck clothnigs anymore.
5. err.


5 Favourite Toys
1. my cellfone.
2. his tongue. (;
3. my computers.
4. my pillows on bed.
5. my home phone.

youu!! i just dont know what is wrong with me? why am i like this? why honey baby? why? i know that you truly love me and im not saying im doubting your love but my nights are spent on wondering about you. wild questions often goes running through my mind. questions like...

why do i often go doing the wrong things at the wrong time?
why am i even saying the wrong words till it hurts you emotionally?
why am i so stupid to be doing all this?
have i given you all the love that you need?
why do i feel like im losing you to someone else?
will i be able to live on if our love fails?
why is that insecurity feeling suddenly in me?
am i holding on to our love too strongly?
or is it that im just taking our love as a on-off thingy?
why do you treat me so nicely even when you know of my past?
do i really deserve to be loved by a guy like you?
argh!!

you often leave me wondering honey baby.

hey peeps reading! do visit this website aitesz. im thanking you IN ADVANCE for doing so.
http://kevan.org/johari?name=fArLyAnNa